Relational Weekend

One of the biggest struggles for parents in guiding their family is to create an environment that fosters relationships. There are so many things that can take the place of personal bonding--most typically TV, movies, computers, video games, and sports. We can even do some of those things together with the idea that we're bonding and interacting, but they're often just a poor substitute for real personal interaction.

Friday set the tone for the next three days here. Keith returned from a last minute trip to Texas. It had been a rough three days here without him. I know that we are under the attack of Satan and need to guard against his arrows, but it was one of those weeks where I felt like Satan left me alone, but put a big target on my back and let others take the shots. I was ready to hibernate from humanity and hide away with my family!

Keith brought Aunt Susie back with him and I couldn't have gotten a bigger boost. They are my two biggest fans. All the praise and adoration and encouragement I could want comes from them. Good start to the weekend.

Lisa got a call Friday evening from Mary (our lived-with-us-for-two-years-so-she's-part-of-the-family adopted daughter) inviting her to spend the evening with her (she moved to her own place).
They ate and played and did girl things and Lisa came home SO HAPPY! It's hard to be sandwiched in between five boys at home. (Gotta love Mary's culinary pants!)

On Saturday, the boys all worked with Dad cutting, splitting, and stacking wood, loading and hauling rocks and gravel, and shoveling it into needed areas. It was hard work, but they enjoyed the effort (their words, not mine) and were happy around the supper table.

Susie and I were invited out for coffee with Dana, Coley and Anna Beth (take Susie for coffee and you have a friend for life). I don't really get jealous of the free time the girls have to get together for these outings, but it was really fun to be included with willing boys to watch Gabe for the morning! Later, Susie and I took Goodwill by storm and outfitted her for the winter.

Sunday afternoon Dana joined me in the kitchen (voluntarily) to prepare lunch and we all ate almost an hour after we'd planned because she and I kept getting caught up in conversation.

While we talked, the boys were doing this:
I could here cheering and the sound of a marble rolling, but couldn't have imagined what it was. They were bowling....with marbles.....down an alley lined with blocks. And for pins:
They flattened the bottoms of pieces of candy corn and stood them up. It was tough. After four frames Troy was leading with 17. Shane and Owen were tied with 1.

We sat around the lunch table talking while the uneaten food grew cold, no one in a hurry with no plans for the day. Keith told everyone, "I want you to find a quiet place and spend some time alone this afternoon. You can read, or pray, but spend time with God in quiet." Lisa excused herself and left the room. We were still sitting at the table talking when she returned and whispered to Keith, "I read a verse in the Bible. Can I go color with Aunt Susie now?" Keith decided that was sufficient quiet time for a seven-year-old!
Susie has loved having Lisa's company, and Lisa's loved having a girl to color and talk about princesses with. But, Susie was still delighted to call home and talk with her best friend Joan.


So, it felt like God removed the target for a few days. I was relaxed, and not feeling scrutinized. I was even feeling loved, and enjoyed seeing those around me connecting with each other. But, the final balm came Sunday evening when Keith jr. and Dana sang "I Will Lift My Eyes" at church. This song did two things for me.

First, it comforted me seeing my children sing it. Not because it puffed me up that they were singing, but because it reminded me of the greatest focus I need to have in raising my children--to see them living a life that lifts up Christ. It takes a toll on a mother to hear her family criticized and critiqued. I should be strong, and tough, and focused, and forgiving and, and, and....but sometimes it's hard, and it hurts. Seeing them sing helped comfort me in the knowledge that it's not about me.

Second, the song became a prayer of my heart. I felt a need to lift my eyes to the Maker, to lift them up from the hurts and barbs and from myself. And the realization that God had blessed me with a reprieve from the hurt and had nurtured and cared for my soul, even BEFORE I prayed for the lifting of my eyes to Him was proof again of His amazing care for me. I was awed by His love for my soul and the place of my heart. I didn't need to come to Him first, He came to me, and then drew me to Him.

It was the highest of relationships that was nurtured.

I WILL LIFT MY EYES
By Bebo Norman


God, my God, I cry out
Your beloved needs You now
God, be near calm my fear and take my doubt
Your kindness is what pulls me up
Your love is all that draws me in

I will lift my eyes to the Maker
of the mountains I can't climb
I will lift my eyes to the Calmer
of the oceans raging wild
I will lift my eyes to the Healer
of the hurt I hold inside
I will lift my eyes, lift my eyes to You

God, my God, let mercy sing
her melody over me
and God, right here all I bring
is all of me
Your kindness is what pulls me up
Your love is all that draws me in


I will lift my eyes to the Maker
of the mountains I can't climb
I will lift my eyes to the Calmer
of the oceans raging wild
I will lift my eyes to the Healer
of the hurt I hold inside
I will lift my eyes, lift my eyes to You


'Cause You are and You were and You will be forever
the Lover I need to save me
'Cause You fashioned the earth and You hold it together, God
so hold me now

I will lift my eyes to the Maker
of the mountains I can't climb
I will lift my eyes to the Calmer
of the oceans raging wild
I will lift my eyes to the Healer
of the hurt I hold inside
I will lift my eyes, lift my eyes to You
I will lift my eyes, lift my eyes to You

God, my God, I cry out
Your beloved needs You now